Where to?

So...with Valentines Day just around the corner, I want to talk about anything BUT Valentines Day. I'm single. Do you think anyone wants to hear about how much money I am not spending this Friday. I'm just kidding ya know. I am guilty just as much as the next person of showering my significant other with love and generosity a little more than usual on this day, but as God has so eloquently told me, I am not ready for the love of my life yet. I am NOT ready for a relationship other than the relationship that I have with Him. He tells me, focus on the work I am doing in you first. Talk to me and lean on me and then maybe we will talk about adding a #3.

I'll be up front and honest, for a few months I was constantly asking God, where is she? I wonder if any of us have ever caught ourselves asking God when He is going to bless us. When are you going to give me what I so deserve? Did you see how I paid for my friends lunch the other day? Did you see how much I raised my hands in church last Sunday?

When did we ever deserve anything at all from God?

I am actually writing this entire post on the fly so Praise God for letting my words flow without hesitation.

"The Lord looks down from Heaven on all mankind to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God. All have turned away, all have become corrupt; there is no one who does good, not even one.

Pretty bleak huh? But let me show you what happens next

"Oh, that salvation for Israel would come out of Zion! When the Lord RESTORES his people, let Jacob rejoice and Israel be glad" - Psalm 14:2-3 and Psalm 14:7.

Over this long period of time, I went through three stages of prayer.

1. Wants

I noticed that a lot of my prayers sounded like a letter I would write to Santa Clause. It started as you would expect with a "Dear God" and then went down the list of things I was having trouble with, what I wanted out of my life and asking God to fulfill those things in my life. During this whole wish list process, we forget that God already has given or plans to give the gifts that we need to give the most glory to Him. To give the most to our part of the Body of Christ. Whether it has been already given (spiritual gifts) or is yet to be given (blessings), God gives even though we will never deserve it and he will bless us when he are most reliant on His grace.

2. Ill-Deserving

The next stage is when we have the realization that we do not deserve anything that we are asking for from God. I was sitting on my couch in mid-prayer a few months ago when something inside me just told me to stop talking. It wasn't like He was asking me to stop asking, but it was just a request to be quiet. Just be still and know that I am God. I was missing the point. If I was ever able to deserve the gifts God has already given me, love would have a price tag. It wouldn't be real. I remember sitting there in my living room. It was a warm feeling that told me that I would always be taken care of, but not by my own request. God calls our name first, not the other way around and as he molds us and shapes us, the clay does not second guess the creator. The pot does not wonder why He was being made in such a way.


3. Peace

I went back to my old job this week after being in a different department for close to a year. I won't go into the details but if I could sum up what has been going on at my office the past couple days, it would be "Total Utter Disaster." People were being laid off left and right or leaving for other opportunities and me and a select few were being allowed to stay to walk over the mess.

I want to take a moment to put a focus on the tangible presence of God. Some of you who are reading this may be thinking that prayer is mostly a gamble or maybe it's nothing at all. I am just some illogical spiritualist who spends his time talking to the wall. To be honest, I hope you're reading this, because there would be greater joy for me than for you to have an encounter with God. It would be my greatest joy for you to feel His love in a tangible way that you would feel a peace that engulfs you and no matter what is happening, no matter how unsure you are about what is coming in the next week, next month or next twenty years that you know that you are renewed and cared for. I don't know what is going to happen in the next few months. All I know is that I am loved by my Father who gives without expectation and will walk with me through all toils and snares.

Trust in the Lord. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and please...do not lean on your own understanding. Acknowledge that He listens and that He gives and that strengthens and restores and I promise you that He will take your path, no matter how much it knocks you down or discourages you, hold tight to the promise that He will keep those paths straight.

I hope ya'll are having a blessed Monday and that this week will be a blessed on. Stay Dry Dallas